I Am Guilty Of Lying

I am guilty of lying. Not just once, not twice. No, I used lies multiple times in my life. And so did you.

Yes, you lied. And I know you did. Would you like to know why I am so sure about it? Because we all lie. We all use lies on our journey. It just depends what kind of effect those lies have.

I don’t like lying and therefor my lies are not big ones. But it starts with the usual “Hello, how are you?” and my answer “I am fine, thank you.”

Very often, if it is a stranger, who asks me this question, my answer is a lie. Honestly: Why should I tell a total stranger that I have a shitty day? Why should I tell this stranger, that I just had an argument with someone I like, minutes before I got asked how I am? Why would I tell this stranger the truth? And: If I would tell this stranger the truth and would answer “Actually I feel like shit…”, how would that be perceived?

I often feel like there is this unwritten rule (or maybe it is actually written down somewhere) that you always answer with “I am fine, thank you”. So if you suddenly answer truthfully and either say “I feel bloody bad today” or “I had a shitty day so far” or “it is none of your business” or “why are you asking, you don’t really care anyway” or even with a “I feel absolutely great” would it still be considered a polite answer? I am not so sure about it. Maybe the “I feel great” one would but not the negative ones. Nobody wants to hear that you feel bad really, so you tend to lie about it. You lie about how you feel just to be polite, just to not be the party pooper.

I admit I also told other lies in my life. But I feel like none of them were bad ones. They were so called white lies. The ones that really don’t have a huge affect on anything. Lies that make other people feel better, you know.

The kind of lies I also tell my kids. Yes, I lie to my kids! Especially at the moment. I lie to them, when I tell them, that Santa will be here soon. I lie to them, when I tell them, that the Easter Bunny exist. I lie to them, when I tell them, that the Toothfairy was here. But why should I not! I want them to believe in something that we can not explain. And this world needs this little magic. This world needs some “feel good lies”. I kind of know that Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Toothfairy and all of them are not real, still I don’t want to stop believing myself. I want them to be real. And maybe that is why I keep telling this little white lies.

Lying is not always wrong. In my book it depends what the reason for your lies are. If you lie to hide something, something that you did wrong, then I don’t think it is good. I think you need to face the issue and solve it. When you lie and your lie gets someone else in trouble, then it is not a good thing. You should never do that. Stand up for yourself and be honest about what you do or what you have done. Never make anybody else pay for your mistakes!

If you lie to make someone feel better, then it is kind of like telling a story. Like in a situation where you know that the truth would only hurt the other person. That you need to tell them a little story for them to be happy, for them to think that you fit their picture… Of course only to a point, where you don’t totally sell yourself.

I thought this will be an easy post. I thought it will be easy to explain what I think and which lies I believe are good and which ones are not. But it is not easy at all. It actually gets more and more complicated and difficult to explain.

I consider myself a straight forward person. But as I said, there are moments in which I feel a little lie is better than the truth. Situations where I tell a little story to make someone feel better. It is kind of telling a story about Santa. What I would never do is lying about something really important.

And I guess you always have to ask yourself the question: How would I feel if someone would tell me the lie I am about to tell somebody else? If you can answer, that it would not make you feel bad if you would find out, then I guess it is an okay lie to tell.

And as Mark Twain used to say: “If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything.”

As kids, we’re told, time and again, that lying is wrong. Do you believe that’s always true? In your book, are there any exceptions?Sweet Little Lies, Daily Prompt

15 thoughts on “I Am Guilty Of Lying

  1. Yes, we all tell little white lies to make someone else feel good, or they tell you one in polite response.
    I met up with a fellow boater the other morning coming back from walking the dog, and commented on what a lovely day it was.
    ‘No it’s not’, she grumbled, and proceeded to tell me how bad a start her day had got off to, they’d cut off the water completely to find the leak with no notification to residents, she was behind with her routine and a few other things as we walked the short distance from the gate to the shower block. This lady always tells it as it is!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I agree with you that sometimes it is ok to tell little white lies, for example telling kids that Santa Claus etc exists. Sometimes we lie to cover up other’s thoughtlessness like when your child is let down over something, and you lie to make excuses for them. I am a dreadful liar, not do I like telling lies, but sometimes it has to be done!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You speak for us all. It would be cruel to tell a co worker she looks ridiculous if she’s already at work and can’t change her outfit. It’s always wrong to lie for malicious reasons.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Nobody tells the truth ALL the time. I think it would be actually impossible, even if you wanted to. We lie by omission, we lie because we think we are telling the truth, but aren’t. We lie to spare people’s feelings. I think unless you profit from the untruth, it doesn’t really “count.” Brutal honesty is inevitably more brutal than honest and someone always gets hurt.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I consider myself to be very honest & straightforward, but it is very true that there are times where the occasional ‘white lie’ gets used. And the polite response to ‘how are you’ is an automatic, ‘fine, thanks’. I manage to keep my social lies to a minimum, but I admit to lying by omission – or more accurately, just to following the advice to say nothing if you haven’t anything positive to say.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m pretty awful at social lies because when a coworker comes up to me wearing something that I think looks crappy on them, my reaction is all over my face. If they ask my opinion, I usually say it looks… interesting, or the color looks good, or I’ll try and find something good about it. But if I can’t I have to be honest and say that I don’t like it, but that shouldn’t make them feel bad because my opinion is only one of many. Or something like that. My usual response to “How are you?” Is “I’m doing alright.” because I’m never “fine” and again most people can see that on my face. Doesn’t mean I don’t lie. I can lie, but I have to be prepared for it. ^_^

    Liked by 1 person

  7. When I was married and my wife asked me how I liked the meal she had just spent two and a half hours preparing, believe me, there was only one answer to that question. You can call it a lie if the food was unpleasant (a very rare event), or you can call me a coward, and you can, of course, call me a liar, but that all changes nothing. “It’s delicious dear.” or something to that effect, was all you were going to hear from me. LOL.

    Liked by 1 person

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