Remember when we were kids? Playing with other children on a playground, in kindergarten, school or during play dates? Remember when we were told to play nicely? Well, I do! I played nicely. Up to a certain point most of us did. And then?
When and why do people stop to play nicely? When and why do they decide that it’s beneficial to them to play dirty? How can it be beneficial? And even if it’s not beneficial in any way, why does it seem to be so satisfying to people to play ugly?
Let’s just not talk about the bullying and mobbing in the real world, in schools and in the job world. Let’s ignore that and focus on the web, the social network. Let’s focus on blogging.
For me, play nicely means to respect boundaries, to play fair and to respect other opinions, other ways, other people. Play nicely also means to have a discussion, to voice your concerns and not accept the other point of view, if you are not on the same page. But you do it in a decent way. People who play nicely have character. They are decent and intelligent people. They know how to communicate on a high standard. They believe in themselves. If you believe in yourself you don’t need to make people feel like shit. You don’t need to attack them or their family. You don’t have to play ugly.
When we enter the social network or the blogging world we put a tiny part of us out there. Or maybe even a big part. We enter a different world. A world, where we find exchange and inspiration, where we can mingle with like-minded people, chat about our opinions and learn about the other person’s point of view. It’s also a world, where people can hide behind screens, where people can make themselves appear different than what or who they are in the real word.
When we were kids, we were told to apologize if we didn’t play nicely. We all know that apologizing sometimes doesn’t come easy. We all know that it sometimes doesn’t feel good, especially when actually it wasn’t you who made the mistake. But we also know how good it feels when you apologize after doing something wrong and the other person gives you the “it’s all okay” answer.
I simply don’t understand people who harass others simply because they don’t have the same opinion. I don’t understand why some people keep chasing others, keep writing really ugly stuff, mean stuff, just because they don’t agree. I don’t understand why certain people choose to even talk bad about the other person’s family, just to get to them. Seriously? What’s your problem?
This has nothing to do with open communication. It has nothing to do with sticking to your grounds. This is bullying. It’s a man-hunt and it’s ugly. It has nothing to do with playing nicely, it’s far from being fair and it’s for sure not a sign of intelligence or integrity.
I browse all kind of blog posts and if I really don’t like a blog or what the blogger has to say then I simply don’t follow this blogger, I don’t return and I don’t read the posts. It’s not as difficult. This is not a place where we constantly have to look at each other and listen to each other and read other opinions. We have the option to not do it. Easy! If you don’t agree with something someone else has to say, then either comment and explain where you stand or just don’t and leave the blog. And it’s done. You don’t need to return and hit and kick and hurt over and over again.
So, please people, play nicely! We all remember who it’s done, right? Remember those little words: Respect and tolerance. If you do, you can actually get pretty far. It’s something you can build on. It’s something that might open up new doors. If you communicate with respect and tolerance you might see a side to something you haven’t seen just yet, or you might get someone to see a new side to something. There is no need to play ugly.
And if you get really, really upset, then ask someone you like if you could get a hug. You will feel better again afterwards. I’m pretty sure about it…