Green-Eyed Monster

I often head over to the Daily Prompts and see if there’s something that’s specifically interesting. Today I felt like having a déjà-vue! 

So I decided to rather use an old post of mine about the exact same subject as a blast of the past rather than writing the same thing over again ;-)…

It has actually been three times that the same subject was used for a Daily Prompt. I can’t blame them really as it’s an interesting prompt and I’m sure there’s plenty to write about. The prompts were:

  • “Tell us about the last time you were really, truly jealous of someone. Did you act on it? Did it hurt your relationship?” (May 8th 2015)
  • “Write an anonymous letter to someone you’re jealous of.” (May 15th 2015)
  • “We all get jealous from time to time — what wakes the green-eyed monster for you?” (August 2015)

I wonder though what your take on it is? Have you ever been so totally jealous? And when and why was it?

What makes the green-eyed monster for me? When was the last time I were truly jealous and what was the result of it? A letter to someone I’m jealous of?

Honestly… I don’t know. I struggle with being jealous. I try not to be. Don’t get me wrong. I get there too, sometimes. But the feeling is usually not really strong. It’s more like a “how nice would it be to be able to do this or afford that” feeling. It’s not really jealousy.

Jealousy is a strong feeling. In my eyes a very negative feeling. A feeling you get when you are not really happy with yourself or the life you are living.

I’m really trying to come up with something. Tell you a story about me being super crazy jealous. But I can’t. I’m thinking of a moment where I felt I go up in flames because I felt so jealous. Maybe because of a man. I’m trying to remember a moment where I felt jealous for someone to own something. Not getting anything. I’m trying to think of a moment where I was super jealous of someone for reaching a goal I would have loved to reach. But I’m still blank…

Honestly, I’m not going to far back in my memory. I know, I’ve been there. I’ve felt jealous in all those cases. But it was ages ago and I was really immature. In my opinion a part of growing up and maturing is loosing this feeling of jealousy as it doesn’t help you at all. In the contrary. It blocks you, it stops you from seeing clear. It’s a long learning process and I wonder how I can teach my kids already now that being jealous will not help them get what they want at all.

Yes, sometimes it seems like the grass is greener on the other side. But you know what? It’s only greener on the other side because it has been watered.

And that’s the point. You can spent and waste your time being jealous instead of putting all your effort into reaching your goal. There are certain things you can’t influence. You can’t force love, so I guess you will have to deal with it. But by being jealous you might push the person of interest further away instead of making this person notice you. Or maybe they do notice you, but in a bad way. And you lost! In all the other cases you can actually do something. You can work on your dream. You can make it happen. You can move forward and step by step get closer to your goal. No need to be jealous!

We are in charge of our destiny. What we can’t change is the destiny of others around us. If they reach a goal faster than we did, there is a reason for it. Observe and learn from it. And then build on it.

mountains

Inspired by the Daily Post Daily Prompt – Green-Eyed Monster (August 2015) Green-Eyed Lady (May 8th 2015) and Green-Eyed Monster (May 15th 2015)

20 thoughts on “Green-Eyed Monster

  1. The message is so beautiful. Negative emotions keep coming and it’s part of being human, but if wisdom is with us we are not compelled to act on them. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I saw this prompt the other day on the Daily Post. It enticed me enough to click on it. But then, I had the same issue that you did and moved on to write about other things…. I really like the direction that you went with this prompt! Very insightful 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Great post! It made me think if I had ever been jealous and like you, I can’t really come up with anything. I have envied someone which to me, the word envy isn’t as bad. What I mean is I’ve thought how lucky for someone to do something and I am truly happy and excited for them and a small part of me thinks how much I would enjoy something like that too. Like if someone was going on vacation.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I think as long as jealousy doesn’t turn into a possession or even obesession it can be a big compliment for the other person. Because we only get jealous when something means a lot to us. I was never jealous of others what they had and I did not have. At least I really don’t remember something like that. It is their life and it is Ok. And I have perhaps something they would like. It really doesn’t matter. But I used to be jealous too regardint relationships. I could let go of that at least for the most part. When you know that you can trust fully and you feel clearly about the connection between you and the other one then there simply is no room for jealousy. And even if this bond seems to wither jealousy wouldn’t help at all to fix it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I have some personal experience with this sort of thing, which I feel is also related to priorities. A college friend distanced herself from me when we were in our early thirties. At the time, I had had two easy and successful pregnancies and was the mom of two healthy babies while she was struggling to carry a pregnancy and had several miscarriages. Later she had her two children through surrogates and later still reached out to reconnect with me. We met face to face earlier this year and I could see that jealousy between us no longer existed.

      Liked by 2 people

      • I’m sure it did and I guess I’m glad she overcame her envy or maybe even forgot it. Seems to me, thought, that she is still not a happy person, even after she achieved her goal to become a mom. Might be related to another old sort of wise saying – “Be careful what you ask for. You might just get it.” I do still care about her, though, and hope that someday she and her family will be happy, or at least satisfied.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Very well stated! I also agree that as we mature jealousy just seems to be weeded out of our lives. I’ve never been much of a jealous person, but I do remember times when I felt jealous. I look back at those times and thing of how immature I was. Your article is very insightful and evokes a lot of thought.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you very much. I believe it has a lot to do with confidence. Confidence in yourself but also in your relationship. And if your trust has not been broken you can build that confidence.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Now I’m jealous. Wish I could have written something like this 🙂 Great post. It’s easier to handle jealousy as we get older. Instead of thinking “I wish that were me” it becomes “glad he’s got that for himself”.

    Liked by 1 person

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