Enough

There are stories out there that just make me feel bad. I read them over and over again and can’t believe what people are capable of doing. There are things I can simply not understand. Bullying is one of them. And it starts with the so called little things. A little push here, a little slap there, some tripping and maybe some little teasing. But the little things add up. And often it doesn’t stop there. The lack of empathy some kids and also some so called grown-ups show is simply incredible. Just like in this case.

I wonder how you can be able to push someone so far to actually try to commit suicide. Someone as young as this girl. And for what? Just because she doesn’t look the way they want her to look like? Or maybe because she doesn’t play the games they like to play, listens to the music they listen to, watches the movies they watch? Maybe it’s because she is too smart or not smart enough, too pretty or not pretty enough. Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder, right? So does everything else. People who bully will always find a reason to bully someone. They will always find a victim and they will most probably not let go of their victim until it doesn’t move anymore. Just like one of the fight dogs…

What’s the problem with our society nowadays? Did we become such heartless people that we are willing to push and push and push and hurt and scar someone to the point of no return? Is life too easy so we need a little “challenge” in destroying others?

I don’t get it.

And I don’t understand how parents can watch.

Watch how their kids destroy someone else. Watch how they bitch and sabotage and hurt and keep going over and over again. You might say that the parents don’t get it. That they are not aware of what’s going on. Another sad fact, right? Obviously we are so detached from our kids that we have no clue what’s happening.

Did times change that massively? Or has this always been around?

How is it that we can accept behavior like this on the school-grounds, the playgrounds and at work but realize how much of a crime it is if a dictator is doing the same with his country, with “his” people? Of course this is on a totally different scale but what do we teach our kids if we don’t stop them from hurting others? What do we teach our kids if we don’t stand up for them and make sure that the bullying stops? We teach them that it’s okay. That they can get away with it.

I’ve spent so many hours trying to figure out what I think of bullies. I’ve written about it before (see here and also here) Do I feel sorry for them because most of them have been victims too and just pass it on to the next one? Or can I simply not find an excuse for such behavior. Honestly, as much as I want to say it’s inexcusable I still think about it.

As with everything there’s always black and white. In this case I believe there’s the bully who bullies because of simply not knowing how to deal with a situation other than with putting others down, belittle others. It’s the bully who’s a victim too. But then there’s the psycho as well. The person who just enjoys. Dangerous… The person you definitely never want to mix with.

I wish there would be an easy solution. A solution that guarantees that kids like the little girl in the story won’t be pushed to the point where they actually try to take their lives. I think we’ve seen enough in this world. Enough bullying, enough war, enough killing, enough torture and misery.

37 thoughts on “Enough

  1. I completely agree with you. It’s just getting worse and worse, and the worst part is that the kids nowadays who are partaking in such bullying actually do it in a sadistic way, they achieve happiness by seeing other people cry, what has mankind come to? It’s a sad time really. I’m also posting about something similar today, be sure to check it out at http://www.shareyourstoryexperience.wordpress.com

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I was bullied and my daughter was bullied. But there was a huge difference, because she was also threatened physically. I think that bullying became more aggressive compared with years or decades ago.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. A very thoughtful piece. When I was younger, I thought I had just make through high school and I wouldn’t have to deal with bullies anymore. But I was wrong, bullies are everywhere just mistaking quietness as weakness and trying to dominate constantly. It’s hard and there are days when all I want to do is curl up and hide. I’ve had enough too.

    Thank you for posting ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Being a school counselor who works with those who have both been bullies and are bullied, I can honestly say that there are few things in this life that make me angrier than seeing a kid getting picked on just because they’re different or smaller. I’m talking, verge of tears kind of anger.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Great food for thought. Like you, I have no use nor do I have tolerance of bullying of any kind. I think part of the issue is the pandering to this type of behavior. When we moved from NYC to the New Jersey suburbs, I was shocked at the behavior of some of the children that my own kids met. City kids are just different. They actually are more mature and more accepting of everyone–I think it comes from living with diversity. That being said, we received a letter from the elementary school my daughter was attending–there was to be a “class” on “How To Deal With Bullies”. I went ballistic and called the school. I could not for the life of me figure out just WHY kids need to DEAL with bullying. The BULLIES need a lesson and they need expulsion! Bullying should NEVER be acceptable.
    I blame our overly PC society, I also place the blame on parents. Do parents NOT teach their children kindness and to treat others the way they want to be treated? Is it because parents have so much hate boiling inside of them? I don’t understand and don’t think I ever will. We are on this earth but for such a short time. We NEED to really get along and accept others….I’m rambling…………. sorry! XOXO!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. It is a tragedy that affects so many families. We moved often, sometimes the new kids were welcomed, sometimes they were shunned. My daughter was of an age where she handled it, my son was not. He was bullied, and it changed him. I didn’t find out about it until his health was jeopardized. I wish there was an easy answer to the prevailing ugliness. I’ve found that often the bullies are victims of their own horrors at home. A vicious cycle.

    This young lady grew to be the princess she dreamed of…a warrior princess ! ☺

    Thanks for an important post. It inspires me to address the words on just one sign in that video…
    “Don’t ignore sibling rivalry”. What happens when the bully is one of your family ? Van

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Although I think that bullying has always been around, I certainly believe that it is getting worse. Many parents don’t parent anymore. Instead of setting rules for the children and sticking with them, they let the kids run the show. Children now days have very little respect for others or even for themselves. It doesn’t help that many parents are teaching the kids how to bully through their own behavior. Our kids watch and listen to everything. We need to set good examples and teach them that wrong is still wrong.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Sadly, this isn’t new, we are just a lot more aware of it now thanks to mass media and social websites. When I was a young girl in the 1960s, I was bullied to the point of a mental breakdown at the age of 14. Unfortunately, I wasn’t the only bullied kid in my school who was driven to the breaking point, although — at least in my case — bullying was only part of the problem. My worst traumas and abuses were happening at home.

    I recently read a post on the topic of bullying that is so amazing, I think every person on the planet who can read, needs to read it. Certainly every parent, grandparent, teacher, the bullied, and even bullies could benefit from reading it. Here is the link:
    http://www.danoah.com/2010/10/memoirs-of-bullied-kid.html

    I believe that posts like yours are making a positive difference. Even after all these years, it soothes my heart to read your compassionate words. Thank you for your kindness and caring.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. It’s always been around. It started when I want to school (aged just shy of 4) and my parents didn’t find out until my brother went to the same school two years later. It’s the whole community that lets it happen. By not actively doing anything, both as an “innocent” bystander or parent or teacher and whoever else might bare witness, is bullying. The person being bullied is utterly alone. Parents can fight and argue and be right all they want, if no one else does their child still gets bullied. As with racism and sexism, when you do not interfere at the moment it’s happening you are leaving the victim to their own devices and it will continue to happen.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Truth in this post – enough! Aside from a medical illness, behaviors are taught, learned, encouraged or even ignored in the home. We are all responsible. Though we can’t control anyone…we can teach and nurture compassion and bravery. Thank you for this brave post!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Pingback: A Bullying Lesson | A Momma's View

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