100%

What seems to be 100% for some might not seem that way for others. It’s a lesson I’ve learned over the years. Something I stated in a comment to Sobadass.me on one of her posts. Great blog, by the way, you should check it out!

You might wonder where I’m going with this, so let me tell you.

In her post Sam mentions that she always gives 100% but sometimes feels like she does not receive it from others. Well, in short. You need to read the entire post. Right away I could totally relate to what she said. At the same time everything inside of me screamed “but”!

So here is my “but”: Sometimes it’s simply different than what you think it is.

As simple as that.

What seems to be 100% for us might not be the same for others. What seems less than 100% might seem to be the full load for others. It’s something I found out thanks to a friend of mine.

I always felt like I was giving her 100%. I tried to stay in touch, I tried to be there for her, I tried to be a good friend. And she appreciated it. But I always thought I would not get the same back. I felt she was not trying to stay in touch as much as I did. I felt like I did not receive the support I was giving her. I felt like for her our friendship was not as important than it was for me.

I was wrong.

She was the one who was always there for me. Through think and thin. Through all the ups and downs. She always gave and still gives 100%. Just in her way. And I learned what her way is.

Learning and accepting that we all have our own and unique way of giving and taking was a big lesson in my life. Probably the biggest lesson in regards to friendship but also for many other areas of my life too. It made me see the value of this friendship in an entirely different light.

It’s important that we try to see the situation form the other person’s perspective before we just simply guess. We are all very different. Not only in the way we look.

20 thoughts on “100%

  1. Thank you for your thoughts on this; I agree. Sometimes when we give and it doesn’t seem to come back, it DOES COME BACK in unexpected ways. They do come in their own way and time. I’ve experienced that too. It may not come from those we give too, but it comes from others what we put out for others. I have also learned that if I give without expecting anything back, I will live with no disappointment:):) This is hard for me because I have expectations for myself and for others, but I’ve learned that others will not always return, so I give and if it comes back, great; if not, I will understand:):) Great life lessons for us all from your post!

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    • I think you have a good point there. Sometimes we give and feel we don’t get back from the receiver. But maybe we receive from another side, a side we have not given anything to just yet…

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  2. Great inputs, Sandra! 100% are relative regarding the daily constitution. 100% today can be less than the 100% tomorrow. And as you say, 100% depend on the person itself. It is subjective!

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  3. Thanks for sharing your experience with your friend. This kind of reminds me of Gary Chapman’s 5 love languages teaching. I took a premarital counseling course through my church and one of the things we studied was his teaching. It changed the way I experience love and gratitude to my husband and friends. I guess we feel 100% when our “friendship tank” is full. Good post.

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  4. This is some great perspective. Typically you think of a marriage where each person “chips in” equally into the marriage. The reality for me is that, when you add in my wife’s numerous mental and physical issues, it is decidedly lopsided. That being said – she tries to chip in her “100%” but it may not match mine – however I recognize and appreciate all the effort she makes.

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  5. Excellent post Sandra! I can actually relate this to my professional work place. We are going through appraisals and everyone is fighting to get that rating. The relative competition that we are all in makes us realize the difference in our perception of dedication and work. It is actually educational!

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  6. It’s about bringing your own A game. Your own personal best. Not a game that is judged or evaluated by someone else. Or in comparison to someone else’s. If you are able to surround yourself with people who are happy with your A-game then you are in a very fortunate place in your life.

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  7. First off, I love your end quote. I saw that one a couple days ago on FB and it still makes me laugh. This post is so true. Friendship is so much better when we’re not keeping score. It`s better when we stop ticking off the tally marks on how much one has done for the other.

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    • Very good point. It’s the comparing that gets in the way. It’s not about it. And yes, I found the quote on Facebook and another one as well, which I would have loved to add but couldn’t find it anymore.

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