I used to work with my husband. Not only work with him but he was also my boss. Often people asked me how we could manage it. How we could manage to work together and be together.

I always thought it was a silly question. Why wouldn’t it work? What could possibly be the issue. When I asked those questions the answer usually was that it would be too much for them to spend all day together. That they would struggle to come home and already know how each others day was. They told me that they couldn’t handle the fact that work would be “brought home” and that there would be a risk about only talking about work at home or on your days off.

I still wonder why people would struggle with all of that.

My husband and I always worked really well together. Not just as a couple but also in regards to our work. I always found it really motivating to be able to do it together. Of course we talked about work often at home. But isn’t that what couples do anyway? I mean, don’t you come home and tell your spouse how your day was?

I don’t think that just because you work together you know how each others day was. There’s still much to talk about. We spent the majority of our time at work in the same room. And still we both had different stories to tell when we got home. We had different issues that had to be solved and I always loved the fact that I was able to discuss it with my husband, knowing he knew all the issues involved.

To the day I like it when we can work on something together. I believe that we complete each other. I love it when we discuss work related things and help each other overcome issues by voicing our opinions. It’s all about teamwork. And I believe that it doesn’t make a difference if you are involved with each other or not. A team either works well together or it doesn’t.



12 thoughts on “Teamwork

  1. Wow Sandra. I never knew you worked with you husband. My husband and I work together and there are some days I do find it challenging , but it is great working on something together.
    What are some tips you can offer me when times get tough with high stress levels and deadlines?

    Liked by 2 people

    • We once were in the situation where a client had hired another company for one part of the project and us for the rest. About 3 months before the event the other company disappeared, leaving the client and us with a crazy task. What can I say, I was highly pregnant and stress level and pressure were so high. I guess you need to then find a moment to sit down together and say “how can we do it and not kill ourselves and each other”. It comes down to one thing: you pull on the same rope and into the same direction. The one thing we always knew was that if we waste energy and time with having issues between the two of us we will not be able to do it. You need to be able to feed of each other in a good way and then obstacles turn into challenges you can overcome. Important is the dialog. Where can you help each other out, where can you take things over from the other which might not be in your responsibility but allow the other one to finish something that needs to be done first.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Love it. Great advice and wise words. We have worked together for 10 years now in different projects and married for 14. There are some great times and some not so great times. Your “pulling on the same rope” comment was great. Thankyou xxx

        Liked by 1 person

      • I guess that’s what it all comes down to. The rope thing… You know how often I heard people tell me that we all need to pull on one rope but actually had the impression that everyone was pulling in another direction?

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Guest Bloggers Wanted I Wednesday Wishes

  3. My parents worked in the same office (it was my mom’s family’s business) for a long time. Since Mom has a kind of domineering personality and Dad could on occasion have a violent temper, I sometimes wondered how they could be together both at home (home offices were not in vogue then) and in the office. In the end I realized that they did it in two ways: (1) they didn’t perform the same functions – Mom was bookkeeper, Dad was underwriter in their insurance office and (2) they didn’t bring much of it home with them, literally or figuratively, which sometimes meant they spent more than 8-10 hours/day in the office but when they were home they were fully home and partnered that way for us kids.
    I have written before about how my spouse worked a lot of hours, both in the office and at home, and also traveled a lot, before he retired. Even when he was home with us, he wasn’t really with us. One of the traits we have in common is that we both are kind of solitary individuals who are often able to find more peace and contentment alone and apart so I understood when and why he would separate himself from us. During this time we were able to partner up on discussing the important family issues and making joint decisions. As time passed, and these decisions became less critical, we became each others’ best sounding boards, advisors and confidantes about work related issues. Even though we worked in different industries, we performed some of the same functions and office politics and personality clashes and discontent with the way things are done are common across most office workplaces, which made these conversations both comfortable and comforting.
    My mom used to give me a lot of grief about all the time Spouse and I spent apart. Now I have turned the tables on her since she needs a respite from her steady boyfriend of the last ten years since Dad passed. They are very different people so sometimes during their times together I think they stress each other out. And, now that my spouse and I are both retired, we still tend to spend a lot of time apart, each of us doing our own thing, and each of us continuing to support the other in whatever that thing is. We both now occasionally say to each other, as I said to him during those times when he would have to travel a lot, that just knowing that the other is nearby is still provides a “peaceful easy feeling” (quoting The Eagles lyrics) for both of us. Our teamwork is along the lines of the song “Gentle On My Mind” which was written by John Hartford and won four 1968 Grammy Awards. Hartford reported that he was inspired to write the song after seeing the film Doctor Zhivago when his own memories took over, and that it took about thirty minutes to write down.
    “It’s knowin’ that your door is always open/And your path is free to walk
    That makes me tend to leave my sleepin’ bag rolled up/ And stashed behind your couch
    And it’s knowin’ I’m not shackled by forgotten words and bonds/And the ink stains that have dried upon some lines
    That keeps you in the back roads/ By the rivers of my memory and keeps you ever gentle on my mind”
    You can find the rest of the lyrics here

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s