Do you do some reflecting on your life every now and then. Just out of the blue? Like on a nice evening, when you are just by yourself and you let your thoughts take over? Sometimes I do. Tonight was some sort of a combination between listening to an interview with I-don’t-know-who-she-was. But she made me think when she started talking about all the big chances she took in her life.
She made me think because it was all work related.
We take chances every day. At least that’s what I believe. And not just work related. So I kept thinking about it and I kept wondering what this ladies answers would be if I’d ask her what her biggest chances were she took that were not work or career related. I wonder what she would have answered to me if I would have asked her why obviously her work and her career take in such a huge part of her life. The question was in no way related to her career. It was actually more about life in general and the interviewer tried to guide her into answering the actual question.
While she was insisting on answering the way she wanted to answer or maybe to the question the way she wanted it to be, I started drifting off and thinking about the chances I have taken so far and decided to share this Blast From The Past about it with you.
What’s the biggest chance I’ve taken so far in my life? Looking at this question I was tempted to answer that it was my move to Australia. It was a big chance to take indeed. With no family in Down Under and only two friends we already knew it seemed like a very lonely place and very far away from everything when we stepped on that plane.
What if it would not work out? What if we would not settle and would not be able to stay? What if… In the end or at least until now it all worked out. And still I could have made this post about our move to Australia and gone into more details about our move and our life down here.
Then I gave it another thought and came up with something entirely different.
I think the biggest chance in life I took so far was marrying my husband after only such a brief time of dating. So many things could have gone wrong. To be honest, we barely knew each other when we said yes. Looking back now it could have ended in a disaster. So many people around us, so many friends, thought we were completely insane. It was just not normal not to date each other and then move in with each other and live together for at least a couple of months or years before tying the knot (for those of you who have not read it yet, here’s our story).
It was done differently to how we did it. People go out together for a while, they live together for a while and then eventually they get married… or they might not.
We’ve seen so many couples suddenly split up after years and years of dating. And we knew then what we know now: There’s simply no guarantee.
I wonder what I would suggest to my daughter or my son if they would do the same thing. Would I tell them to wait and first live together for a while, to get to know each other before making such a huge promise?
Would I? I don’t know.
It would be the reasonable thing to do, right? But how can love be reasonable?
How can you put in words what you feel inside? How can you explain your gut feeling? That gut feeling that tells you if the relationship will work out. If there are doubts most probably it won’t last forever. How could you ever possibly put such a feeling into the right words? I don’t think it’s possible. We all think and feel in so many different ways. What seems totally logical to me might sound completely insane to you. A description that makes total sense to me might throw you off completely.
So how can you put your gut feeling into words? You simply can’t. It’s a feeling. Half of it (at least) will be lost when you try to describe it…
As I’ve written over and over again I believe that you know if someone’s right for you. And when you know you take chances. Maybe it will work out and maybe it won’t. It’s life we are dealing with and it’s constantly moving and changing and challenging you with new things. So how can we ever be sure about anything?
I guess this is what I would say to my kids: There’s never ever a guarantee for anything. You have no guarantee for something to work out. Not a friendship, not a relationship, not a job and not a treatment. And it doesn’t matter how safe or secure or grounded something is or seems, there’s always the chance that it will change.
The right storm will manage to blow every tree down, no matter how strong it seems. The question is if that storm ever reaches the tree..
Everything you do is taking a chance.
And there’s nothing wrong about it.
A reader of mine recently reminded me of Jim Carrey’s Commencement Speech at Maharishi University and I’d like to highlight the following although it’s definitely worth watching his entire speech:
You can spend you whole life imagining ghosts, worrying about the pathway to the future, but all their will ever be is what’s happening here and the decisions we make in this moment, which are based in either love or fear…
You can fail at what you don’t want, so you might as well take a chance on doing what you love…
Do what you love and spend your time with who you love. There will never be anything wrong about this. And this is something I will for sure teach my children. Don’t live your life fearing what could possibly go wrong and in doing so stop living. Live your life, take those risks, take those chances, do what you love. Take the chances YOU decide are worth taking.
We are so scared of taking chances in life because we fear to have regrets about it later. How can we have regrets if we take a chance and do something we love and be with someone we love, instead of just do something so something is done? I often wonder how people can talk about a safe decision, a safe path to go, a safe option to take. Nothing is safe. Nothing is guaranteed, nothing is for granted. We can never know where life leads us. So how can we know what’s safe?
What do you think is better? Taking that chance, taking a risk or choose the so called safe way?
I took a huge chance marrying the man I knew would be my Mr Right. We are still here. Together and happy. We’re friends, partners, a team, a strong unit. It was the biggest chance in my life so far and it payed off and I will never regret having taken this chance in the first place.
Inspired by the Daily Post Daily Prompt – Take A Chance On Me