Just recently a friend and I talked about how we really only know the surface of things. How we only see what people want us to see and know only what they want us to know. The happy family might not be as happy. The fit friend might not be as healthy as we think. And the beautiful house might not look as nice and shiny in the inside as it does from the outside. I’m still thinking about what we discussed back then and I can’t help but sharing a post from last year as a Blast From The Past in which I talk about what might lie behind a closed door…
I find doors intriguing, especially the imagined ones. We never truly know what lies behind a closed door. We only can imagine. The outside might look neat and clean and pretty but on the inside it could be a totally different story. Same the other way around. I believe this does not only apply to houses with their real doors but also to people and what they show us.
I often wrote about the fact that we never truly know what goes on inside of someone. We never truly know the entire story, the entire picture. It’s the same with buildings. All we see is the facade, the door, the windows, the outside. Until that door opens and we are invited to step inside. And still… there might be more rooms, more doors, more hidden places, more secrets.
People only show us what they want us to see. When I invite people over I make an effort to present our home in a nicely manner. I usually clean, I make sure everything they see is tidy. I’m glad that there are doors I can close. Places in our home they will not see. Spots that can remain messy.
Our life is the same. We invite people we trust and like to see as much as we want them to see. Some of them will only see our clean and tidied up self. Some we will allow to see a little bit of the mess, some more and only a few might be allowed to see the uncleaned untidy version of ourselves and our lives.
Houses can look slightly broken or shabby from the outside but then stun visitors with a beautiful inside. As long as the door remains closed though, you will not see the inside. You will probably judge the place from how it looks from the outside. You might walk away feeling that you never want to step inside. Never have a closer look at it.
Then there are the houses that wow you from the outside, appear clean and beautiful, luxurious and warm. But when the door opens and you see the inside it’s empty, messy, maybe dirty, maybe broken. However, as long as we don’t get invited in we will never know how it looks inside. All we will know is the stunning looks from the outside. The way it looks with its door closed. The fake facade that is presented to us.
Just like people.
Now, every place has its story, a story that might or might not be hidden behind a door. A story that is meant to be told or meant to be hidden. Just like people. We all have our story. We all have our things we carry around. We all have things we are happy to talk about and things we want to keep for ourselves. Just as we should never look at a building and judge by only seeing the outside, we should never judge someone by what we see.
There is more to everything. There’s a story to everything. There’s a reason for everything. And as long as we are not invited to see more, to learn more, we should not make assumptions. Not in regards to buildings and places and for sure not in regards to people.
We all wear our mask, we all use our doors, we all have our walls. Some stories are meant to be kept indoors. Some stories are meant to be kept safe. Never every should you try to get someone to tell you the story that they are not comfortable to tell. As much as you would never break in a door just because you are curious to see what’s hidden behind it.
A door should be opened by free will and in the right time. The door should be opened in order to invite you in. When you are invited in, the door will be wide open. When you are invited in all the other doors might be opened for you too. To the point where you see the entire picture. Then the story can be revealed, it can be told. And the door will always remain open and you will become part of the story that was once hidden behind that very door…