About Sorry

We teach our kids to say sorry. We also teach them that they have to mean it. Saying sorry just so it’s said doesn’t change anything. You have to mean it. “Sorry” is one of the word that gets used easily, I find. Sometimes without any heart in it. It’s the polite way of interaction.

Where am I going with this? Frankly, I’m not sure. I just saw this post of a Facebook buddy of mine. A post in which she writes about how she constantly says sorry for everything. And that it’s time to stop doing this. 

It made me think about where it comes from because I have a tendency to do that too. Like the other day when I was waiting and waiting and my friend was so late. And then, when she arrived I had to leave. Although she was an hour late I apologized for having to leave after only seeing her for 30min rather than over an hour. 

Or when I apologize for finding something funny or for being tired. So many moments I say sorry for something I should not apologize for. I wonder why…

Is it the upbringing? Do we raise our kids the way they eventually feel they need to apologize for being successful, healthy, nice, smart, you name it? Just because it’s polite? Do we raise them to apologize for being pushed in a queu, rather then expecting the other person to say sorry. 

Sometimes telling the kids that they don’t need to apologize goes a long way. And I believe teaching them to apologize when they do something wrong and only say it if they really think what they’ve done was wrong might be the right thing. You have to mean it if you say it…

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12 thoughts on “About Sorry

  1. I never thought about sincerity coupled with sorry. You are correct; one should mean it when it’s said. Because of where I lived, I probably say sorry a lot more than most people. Instead of saying “excuse me” when you don’t understand someone’s words, Long Islanders often say “sorry?”. There is a definite questioning tone, indicating you want words repeated. I was amused by it for several years, then I shrugged my shoulders and used it all the time. It was short, sweet, and to the point.

    Liked by 1 person

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