There was this discussion in a truly inspiring group recently. The idea of the group is to strive for more. To make yourself the best possible version of you you can possibly be and to dream big and go after your dreams. Simply. Easy.
Or is it?
There was this one person in the group that threw everyone off probably. Her remark was straight forward:
“I have worked hard all my life and always enjoyed my work. I have the best husband in the world and my kids make us more than proud. They have it all together. We live in a beautiful place and I love volunteering in the community. My friends are wonderful. I really don’t have any dreams. Nothing I feel I need to accomplish to feel better. I love my body the way it is. I love my life and where I’m at at the moment. Someone said that I might have to dream bigger but I wouldn’t even know where to start. I live my dream. It’s all there.”
It got really interesting after that. The “maybe you need to set your eyes on a bigger goal” came up, the “but there must be something you want to still achieve, see or do” was dropped. People said that they don’t really believe her because it simply can’t be that you don’t feel like chasing after or achieving something.
All I could think of was the word “content”.
How content must this lady be. What a happy place to be in. And then I started thinking about the quest people are in. The race after “the better”. A better version of you, a better life, a better work-life balance, a better body, a better job, a better lifestyle… the list could go on and on.
Dream bigger… don’t settle for second best… reach higher.
What if you don’t want to? What if the place you are in is exactly where you want to be? And why do you have to rectify it? Why do you have to explain to others that you don’t have dreams. Why does it make people feel sorry for you? Why is it not good enough for them? And does it really matter that they don’t see and understand what you do?
Once again we find each other in the position of explaining ourselves although we shouldn’t have to. Really, your life is nobody’s business but yours. Don’t get me wrong, please! I’m all for empowerment. Nothing beats empowering people. As long as they need it. As long as they want it.
So why is it that people question us, our decisions, our intentions, especially if it seems to be out of the norm? Because once again this is what it’s about, don’t you think? After all it’s not normal to not have dreams, cravings, things we feel miss in our life. So there is an attempt to box it up. Put it in the same drawer everything else is in because it’s convenient. Much more convenient than accepting that someone is just different. Unique! Happy! Content!
Let them be.
This person doesn’t feel any stress in her life. No pressure, no rush. She lives her life happily. Yet people tell her to come up with a dream and she almost feels like she is doing something wrong. As if she has to create a dream to chase after. With this comes pressure. Pressure to fit in, pressure to find something she can dream of. Then there is stress. Stress and frustration because she can’t find anything. Or maybe it will not feel big enough for her. And then she would have to start chasing it. Start running after a goal she never felt she has to set for herself. All because other people felt she needed it.
I really hope she is not letting others pressuring her into this. I really hope she keeps living her happy and content life and that she feels proud to have reached this point in her life where she can say “I have it all, all I ever wanted.”