Last year I wrote a post about an interaction of a mom I overheard. I shared my feelings about her harsh words and what it might do to her kids. And now, 12 months on more or less I’ve met her. Had a chat with her while she was outside playing with the kids, being loving, encouraging, soft. It was so beautiful to watch. Maybe she knew that there was a chance I might have overheard this specific moment back then, maybe it was just a coincidence but while the kids were giggling and playing she looked at them and got quiet. She said: “Sometimes it’s so overwhelming to be a mom and I hate it when I lose my temper.”
We’ve all been there. We’ve all lost it. And we’ve all had regrets. We’ve all said things in the heat of the moment we regretted later. And maybe while in some cases they might stick, sometimes they might disappear because all the other moments take over. The moments in which we are who we want to be. The quiet, calm, loving and supporting parent who always is in control of every situation. The super human we so want to be.
Here is the post from back then. I personally read it in another way today than I did after writing it.
Parenting is not easy. It’s more than a full time job. It’s a 24/7 job, dealing with little individuals who have their opinion, their dreams, their goals, their fears, their dislikes, their tantrums. As beautiful being a parent can be, as exhausting it can feel on other occasions.
One thing I find easier now that our kids are older is, that I have more me time. I can use the bathroom without being interrupted. I can have a shower without spectators, I can drink my coffee while it’s still hot and I can vacuum clean without freaking someone out.
It’s that time of the year my children celebrate their birthdays. With these celebrations there comes a lot of reflection on my side. Reflection about how they developed so far, where they are and where they will go from now on. There are all the worries, all the expectations, the hopes and fears. They are all different for each of my children. Why? Because I have a boy and a girl. And while some worries are the same for both of them some are so totally different. One, though, stands out. The worry about how they will be treated… There are so many things out there that can hurt. And words play a big part in it too. I hope you don’t mind that I share another Blast From The Past tonight…
Sometimes it doesn’t need any words. Sometimes what’s been felt and thought can’t be put in words but expressed in an entirely different way. Sometimes it’s the connection that says it all.
Today I felt this connection.
I don’t want to go into details as of why there were no words. I just want to stress that we not always have to listen with our ears but rather with our heart to get the message.
Some might call it telepathy, some a deeper connection. Whatever it is, it’s there. We just need to open ourselves up to find the connection.
So often do we try to find the right words, the right sentences to explain what’s going on inside of us. In doing so we might “kill off” the real message.
If something, or someone, is really important to you, take your time. Connect. Open your heart. Receive. No words needed…